Fellatio (also known as fellation, and colloquially blowjob, giving head, BJ or sucking off) is, for guys, the greatest gift a woman could give. Aside from adult-films, the mainstream has given us plenty of memorable BJ moments over the years. Today we will be looking at the most memorable. From the funny to the sexy to the cringe-worthy. Leave your thoughts in the comment section below.
11. Reckless Driver – Thinner (1996)
Robert John Burke (you know, the guy who played Robocop in the third film) plays Billy, an overweight (to put it politely) man who accidentally runs over an old gypsy women with his car. What would cause him to do such a thing, was he drunk? No sir, he was simply getting some oral pleasure from his wife (Lucinda Jenney) and couldn’t quite handle it.
10. Premature Setback – Lovelace (2013)
When Amanda Seyfried signed on to play adult-film star Linda Lovelace we knew to expect two things, plenty of nudity and simulated fellatio. While filming her landmark and most memorable film, Deep Throat, Lovelace makes her co-star finish their scene a little…prematurely. We’re talking less than 60 seconds here, like, that’s just wonderful.
9. Severed Head BJ – High Tension (2003)
Gratuitous, cheesy as hell, and has absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the movie. But we must admit, this is the scene that first got our full attention in this early ’00s slasher film. Sometimes you just need to umm… relieve yourself into a severed head, not that we would ever recommend such a thing. What about her teeth? Sorry, that’s sick, we’re disgusting human beings and we apologize for it.
8. Breathalyzer Test Gone Wrong – The House Bunny (2008)
Shelley Darlington (Anna Faris) is a would-be Playboy Playmate living it up at the Playboy Mansion until the unthinkable happens; she turns 27. Soon Shelley is kicked out and living out of her car. After being pulled over by a police officer he pulls out a sobriety tests and tells her he needs for her to “blow” into it. She blows alright, and spends a night in jail for her trouble.
7. Phone-Time Loving – What’s Eating Gilbert Grape (1993)
What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, more like WHO’S Eating Gilbert Grape! Am I right? No? Any who, Johnny Depp plays Gilbert Grape in this early ‘90s drama. Gilbert spends his days caring for his mentally handicapped younger brother (Leonardo DiCaprio) and his morbidly obese mother (Darlene Cates). In the midst of it all Gilbert has a secret affair with a housewife named Betty (Mary Steenburgen), while her busy husband (Kevin Tighe) tries to sell his family life insurance. In the ultimate pimp-player move, Gilbert gets a BJ while he is actually talking to Betty’s husband on the phone. So as I said before, more like WHO’S Eating Gilbert Grape! Still nothing?
6. Ace Gets His Reward – Ace Venture (1994)
Jim Carrey as Ace Venture is the greatest (and probably only) pet detective to ever do it; the film is a classic. Playboy model Rebecca Ferratti makes an appearance as the ex-wife of Randall “Tex” Cobb who hires Ventura to get back her puppy in the film’s first scene. After he successfully does so, Ferratti offers him something better than money…and who could turn down such a thing?
5. Vulnerable Victim Turned Vigilante – The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011)
Rooney Mara is Lisbeth Salander a computer hacker who has survived severe emotional and sexual abuse. Salander’s new legal guardian, Bjurman (Yorick van Wageningen) uses his position of authority to sexually abuse and ultimately rape her, in what is the most brutal scene on this list. Lisbeth eventually gets her revenge; at their subsequent get-together she stuns him with a Taser, anally rapes him with a dildo and marks him as a rapist with a tattoo on his stomach and chest.
4. “Big Stick” – Jawbreaker (1999)
Would you deep throat a popsicle so Rose McGowan would deep throat you? Wait, don’t answer that, it’s weird. In this late ’90s black comedy McGowan plays Courtney, one of the “Flawless Four”, the most popular girls in their High School. They inadvertently kill one of their members and things get dark fast. The most memorable part of the film happens right before the police come to question Courtney. After fooling around with her boyfriend Courtney promises to go down on him but “forgot” how. She tells him if he can show her on a popsicle she’ll do the same to him. Despite the weirdness of it all, he does it, who can blame him?
3. Sippie Time – This Is The End (2013)
If you lookup the term “Michael Cera” in the Urban dictionary this is what you’ll find; “The act of receiving a blowjob from one girl while another licks your ass, and from time to time offering them “sippies” off your Capri sun. May or may not be performed in a bathroom at a party, but should be done while standing.”
Need we say more?
2. Stifler Drinks The Pale Ale – American Pie (1999)
Steve Stifler (Seann William Scott) is probably the most lovable and hated d-bag in all of cinema. Though, even this guy didn’t deserve what happened to him in the first of the sexually depraved American Pie movies. After Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas) gets some oral delight from his girlfriend Vicky (Tara Reid) he decides to relieve himself into a nearby cup of beer. Enter Stifler who goes into this room and takes a swig of that plastic cup of beer. It’ll make you cringe every time you think about it, which is why it’s so funny.
1. Tootsie Pop – Scary Movie (2000)
Guess who’s making another appearance on the list?
Back when spoofing horror movies was still funny Anna Faris as Cindy Campbell was the reigning queen of the sub-genre. During the climax of the film Cindy throws a huge party. Her boyfriend Bobby (Jon Abrahams) finally convinces her to have sex with him, though oral sex takes a little more convincing. Bobby coaxes her to perform the act after comparing it to sucking on a “Tootsie Pop”, she relents and gets to business until she promptly bites his man-parts and proclaims she “never could wait to get to the chewy middle”. OUCH!